Someone actually honked at me…

Picking up from where I left off, I was sitting home alone late one night while both of my old roommates were away for the week. Late one night, it must have been a week day night, I was sitting around the apartment still dressed (thong and bra with newly acquired breastforms, short jean shorts, form-fitting color block spandex tank, and a pair of my newly acquired high heels!), and got the urge to do something crazy.

I know it had to be absolutely incredibly late (like 400am late) because I never would have done this otherwise, but I opened my apartment door and peeked out into the hallway. No one there. I looked to my right, saw the door to the exit stair and took a few steps out of my apartment. I slowly turned the handle and pushed the door open. Before I stepped into the stairwell, I listened for footsteps, but heard none.

I pressed onward… slowly stepping down the stairs to the basement level. The large chunky high heels made their trademark clank on the metal stairs as I continued, but I still didn’t hear anything or anyone else. I got down to the basement level and turned down the long hallway towards the side exit, my heels again clicking as my stride sped up and developed rhythm. I approached the door to the outside world and hesitated. My heart was racing, part nervous from what I was about to do and part excited from the look and feel of my clothes and the sound of my high heels so far.

This side exit door would sometimes get stuck on the door jamb and stay party open enough so you could re-enter. That was my plan, but if it failed I would have to submit and enter the building through the main or rear entrance. The chance of being caught was exponentially higher at those two entrances, so I was scared if something went wrong. But still, I continued…

I pushed the door open, peeked outside and saw no cars moving and no people anywhere. I took a step outside and slowly guided the door to its resting spot against the jamb, still partially open. I did a quick scan of the surroundings and didn’t see any lights on inside any apartments in my building or the others in the complex, and I started to walk. That’s all that I really wanted to do, anyway. Just walk.

I followed the concrete sidewalk around to the back of the building, continued around two wings and up the hill on the other side. Approaching the front of the building now, I was coming up to the main drive around the whole complex as well as a driveway that led to a small spur of parking between a few of the buildings. I turned down the drive to head towards the front of my building, planning on walking past and back down the hill towards the door I had used to step outside. That’s when I saw my shadow creep out in front of me and slowly grow longer and darker. A car was coming behind me…

The feeling I had was unreal… for the whole time up until then, I was excited, turned on, and totally aroused. But when I realized what was happening, I freaked out. I picked up my pace down the hill, past the main entrance to my building. Behind me, I can hear the car coming but just before I feel it’s going to pass me, it turns off the main drive down the spur between buildings. A wave of relief comes over me as I feel I went unnoticed, and then I heard it. beep beeeep. There were two short honks on the horn from the car before it disappeared around the building and I knew that they were directed at me.

Who were they honking at? Were they honking at me? Oh dear god… they saw me. Wait, they saw me. And honked!

The feelings of fear quickly subsided and I became excited again almost instantly. That someone had seen me, albeit from behind, but still felt that a honk was appropriate was such a turn-on, I felt accomplished, but even more so, sexy. The last few hundred yards to the door, I slowed my pace again and began to walk with a bit more confidence. I reached the door and moved quickly through the hallway and up the stairs to my apartment, still a bit nervous of being caught face to face by a complete stranger.

When I got into my apartment though, I ran to my room, kicked off my shoes, and went straight to bed with a smile on my face.

I Wish: A flattering dress or two

Time to add a bit more to the wish list…

I cruised around the Old Navy, Forever 21, and Sears websites a bit this morning. I’ve got two dresses in the wardrobe at home, but just always felt that neither of them were really doing anything for me. Of course, I’m dealing with my not-so-feminine, absolute lack of curves, so my two curve-hugging dresses expose my bodily flaws quite easily. You may remember a while back that I purchased two different body shapers, waist cinchers to be exact, to help me achieve some semblance of an hourglass shape. However, even when wearing one of them, I’ve still got to kind of “suck it in” for them to work; not exactly a comfortable thing to do for a few hours when I’m lounging around.

I find myself particularly drawn to empire waist and A-line dresses for the obvious reasons. An empire waist will gather the dress in just below my bust and allow it to free-fall from there, while the A-line will drape down from the shoulders. Best of all, both styles will hide my figure but still give a playful and sexy look. So here are a few of the dresses that particularly caught my eye:

a few of the dresses i'd love to have

My favorites, you ask? Well, the gray empire waist dress on the far left, the floral A-line dress fourth in line, and well I know it’s off topic a bit, but the maxi all the way at the end. There’s just something about a maxi dress that I like… though I wish it had some cap sleeves or something.

Anyway, something to file under the wish list category!

To dress, perchance to pass

As I had mentioned in the past, I don’t really have the most feminine figure; it’s pretty much what you would expect from a guy in his late 20s. And one of the things that has always bothered me when I dress is that I can never seem to achieve any sort of curves from waist to hips. Well, in my email inbox the other day, I received a promotional email (somehow) from Lucille Sorella of Feminization Secrets promoting a booklet called “10 Essential Secrets to Passing as a Woman.” Considering that I’ve started this blog and hope to broach the subject with my girlfriend and possibly pass in public some day, I decided I would check it out.

The booklet is actually quite simple, highlighting ten of the more critical things to consider when dressing to pass, going into a few paragraphs of detail about each item. When you sign up to receive the booklet, you will also be subscribed to her “Feminization Secrets” email that she sends out every few days. And finally, she also promotes a pay-service website called Stepping Out Secrets that goes into even greater depth about passing as a woman. I’m seriously considering this one as well, but for now, I’m going to stick with the emails and booklet I’ve got already.

But anyway, back to my figure… I’ve always hated my lack of feminine curves and had thought for the longest time that my only remedy would be to lose weight. That is until I read the Feminization Secrets booklet and came across the item touting a waist cincher and hip pads. I’ve used pads in the past, but I couldn’t believe how dumb I felt when I read about the waist cincher idea! It had never crossed my mind!

So I checked out Sears and found two different upper body shapers that I figured I would try out. I got one that is just a basic waist cincher with front snaps and another that is more of a corset-type shaper with padded bra cups. I’m quite happy with them both, but I have to say, I cannot believe how tight that waist cincher is! I tried them both on the other morning and took three pictures of myself in a dress, one with the cincher, one with the corset, and one without either. They of course help a bit, but I guess my next purchase will have to be hip pads!

I’ve got a long way to go before I can pass, but I’m getting there. Slowly…